maybe this year will be better than the last?

Yes, that is a question mark. 2009 seemed like it was going to be a great year, but it turned out to be the worst year of my twenty-four years of life. I almost vomit when I think about it. On top of dealing with my mother's death, I also have had the wonderful experience of not getting a job. Yes, I still have my part-time retail job, but it would be nice to put my degree to use. I've also decided to wait on pursuing a Master's indefinitely, due to a big move that is coming up in our lives. Chris's schedule has been ridiculous, and that's just the way things are going to be for us. And being the eternal pessimist that I am, I am almost certain that 2009 will not be the worst year of my life. Last year I made some resolutions, and was actually pretty successful with some of them. I'm much healthier. I've lost three pant sizes. I take my vitamins. I think about nutritional value (most of the time). I am much more organized, making lists and menus and calendar reminders and such. My bacne is under control. I have worked really hard (so has Chris) on our marriage. I'm ever so thankful that Chris works so hard and has a job that can take us almost anywhere in the world. I'm also thankful that he just wants me to be happy in life, and wants to enable me to do whatever I want. He makes me feel like a lot less of a loser, which I do feel like most days. He says it's all about perspectives. Sometimes he is right, but don't tell him I said that. I know that 2010 will have many travels for our little fam, as well as getting our house ready to put on the market later in the year. There are many things that we must be prayerful about. There are BIG changes coming our way. (Nope, no babies involved. Maybe in seven or eight years. Maybe.) I haven't really enjoyed making pictures much, so that's something I hope I can be better about this year. I still wish I could be better about using coupons, too. I had also gotten into a really good habit about reading my Bible every night, but the past few weeks I've slipped. I hope to keep that up. Wow, okay, so this is a terribly depressing and scattered post. I did a recap for 2008 on my blog, and that is neat to look back on. Here's my recap for 2009: It sucked. Bad. Even though 2009 was a crap year in my history book, I'm still thankful for salvation and forgiveness and eternal life from Jesus Christ. I wish I could tell you that my life is all sunshine and giggles and that things are on the up, but I just can't do that right now. And it's not biblical to say, "Everything will be fine." I know that God has used some big life changes to get my attention. I'm struggling with letting go of my ways and clinging to God's ways. Wow, there's a resolution.