stranded

Have you ever been stranded? It is a most terrible position in which to be. I have a stranded story (and it happened in Walker County) that really made me think about some things. I will share. You may laugh and think it's corny, but I know you're gonna read it because I am just that fascinating.

My grandparents from Florida came up for a quick visit earlier this week. They were staying with my aunt in-the-middle-of-nowhere, Walker County. I have been there many times, but usually Chris drives me. Brooks and I went for a visit. I turned into the wrong driveway, and I realized it almost immediately. I could still see the main road. I put my car in reverse, and began to back down the driveway (which was a steep hill) not thinking about all the recent rain, and my giant SUV slid into a ditch. The entire driver's side was leaning and wedged against an embankment. I tried to shift gears and get out, but I was afraid I would damage the car, or get stuck even worse in the mud. I was SO MAD at myself. I hate doing dumb things like this. My dad was underground in the mines performing an inspection, my husband was on call at the hospital in Tuscaloosa, and my cell phone had no signal. I really love and respect my husband and my dad, but any time I get in a situation from doing something silly, I get lectures, questions, and maybe comments that make me feel even sillier. So I was just a teeny bit glad I couldn't call either one of them to tell them about my latest predicament.

I climbed out of the car (really, I had to push the passenger door up with my legs) in my brand-new super-cute striped heels (my poor dog-child was having a full-blown panic attack in the very back of my giant SUV) and walked down the driveway waving my cell phone around to try to get signal. I called my Grandaddy and told him the road I was on, and he said he was on the way. I was worried because my grandparents usually drive their Toyota Camry when they come to Alabama, and I knew that wouldn't be much help. I waited and waited and waited. It was drizzling rain, there were mosquitoes, and Brooks was panicking even more because I was having a full-blown panic attack at this point. I kept thinking, "Are there gonna be some crazy rednecks that are gonna shoot me for being stuck in their driveway?" I wondered if I should try to flag someone down to help pull me out, or if I should go ahead and call a tow-truck. I was just so angry at myself for messing up, and I could still see the main road for cryin' out loud! I just hate doing dumb things like this. My parents raised me to be a mostly-responsible adult. Getting stuck in the mud is NOT RESPONSIBLE. As all these million things were going through my head, I realized I feel stranded in my life right now. I can't seem to land a job, Chris is super-busy all the time, I miss my mom a little bit more every day, I have no idea where we will be moving, and my life is just so different than I had planned. I absolutely believe that the exact place I am in right now is where God wants me. I am not in a comfort zone by any means. So I feel stranded, but really I'm not. God is with me. He will put me in a different place when He sees fit. All I can do is ask God to help me. All I can do is cling to Him during these difficult times. He has always provided for me, He is providing for me now, and He will continue to provide for me in the future. But I have to ask Him to provide for me. To save me. To take away the sin and the mistakes, even the unintentional stuff, but especially the intentional sin and struggles. I didn't ask to for my difficult situation to be taken away, I just asked that God stay with me. As I stood there in the rain, swatting off mosquitoes, I just began to cry. God is the same, He is so good, regardless of where I am or how I feel or my latest mistake. And He used getting stuck in a ditch and having to ask for help to get my attention. I cannot fix my situation. I cannot take control without causing more damage. I must wait, and trust God.

My Grandaddy got there about minutes later (and he drove their 4Runner this trip, whew). It seemed like a lot longer to me. He didn't say one single negative thing to me, he just hugged me. I was just glad that he was there. He evaluated the situation, and told me to get in the driver's seat. He stood in front of my car, and told me which way to turn the wheel. He guided me, and I listened. After a few seconds, I was out of the ditch. No tow truck, no dents or scratches, no damages to the driveway, or injuries for the dog-child or myself (or my new shoes). The situation wasn't nearly as bad as I had created it to be in my head. I knew if I kept tyring to get out of the ditch on my own, then I would have inflicted more damage. As silly as I felt, I had to ask for help.

Psalm 121
A song of ascents. Of David.
1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.
7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;
8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.

I always feel like my thoughts make sense in my head, and I have a hard time getting them out of my head and explaining to others. It has been laid on my heart to share this experience. I ask God for guidance and direction daily. How can I feel stranded when the creator of the universe is my God? I have said it before, but it really is so comforting to have a God that I can go to with all of my problems and just ask Him for help. The help doesn't always come in a way pleasing to me, but in a way that glorifies Him. He has saved me from the ultimate predicament, death. Do you ever feel stranded? Do you have a difficult time asking others for help? Do you have a hard time asking God to save you?